Sunday, January 17, 2010

A Brief Message from Death's Head Regarding S.W.O.R.D.

Hello, indigenous fleshy inhabitants of the planet we denominate Earth! My name is Death's Head, perhaps you've heard of me, yes? I have been recently appearing in one of your periodical monthly magazines, more commonly called comics. The magazine in question is not properly about myself, but rather about the pesky Sentient World Observation and Response Department that has been vexing my latest exploits, and it's commander Abigail Brand.

Humans, please hit the "Click Here to Read More" hyperlink to read my very important message regarding S.W.O.R.D.

You see, I was doing a little accounting just now, and it seems that S.W.O.R.D. owes me an incredible amount of monetary payments after they destroyed parts of my ship and one of my eyeballs, not to mention taking away the personnel I was supposed to recover, and an invaluable artifact he was holding. But I'm a businessman first and above all, yes? As a freelance peacekeeping agent, I do not hold any grudges against S.W.O.R.D., Abigail Brand, the annoying furry blue mutant, or the tiny dragon creature because of what they did to my very expensive personal carrier and my mechanoid body. As matter of fact, if you have read the latest issue of S.W.O.R.D., you will notice that they are employing my very specific set of skills to aid their many ventures.

I absolutely love money, and S.W.O.R.D. is paying me copious amounts of it to subcontract my persona. I am very impressed by the size of their coffers, but it seems that not enough of you squishy creatures are buying their main source of revenue, which is the monthly color pamphlet I mentioned earlier. If you do not purchase more of these floppy paper products, S.W.O.R.D. funding may actually run out and I will no longer be under their employ. While I am sure I would find greener pastures, I am also sure you want your favorite freelance peacekeeping agent to keep making guest appearances in the title, yes? Not to mention my wonderful temporary boss and temporary coworkers would also be out of a reliable job and consistent flow of income.

So what can you do to help S.W.O.R.D. pay me for the repairs of my interstellar transport, my optical techno-organ, and my absolutely exorbitant day rate? If you are not currently reading the ongoing series of S.W.O.R.D., you should call your local comic book merchant and ask for the series to be placed in your list of purchasable titles. If you are already acquiring the series, you can always introduce the book to one of your friends, loved ones or acquaintances. Spreading the word in your technological web of information and digital social networks is also a very good idea, and a fine venue for campaigns such as this one. Finally, anyone can go to this Uniform Resource Locator to find a printable postal card to be sent to Marvel, the company in charge of appropriating S.W.O.R.D.'s funds. Ask them to keep financing the agency, and by proxy, me, yes?

Yours Truly,
Death's Head
Freelance Peacekeeping Agent and Personal Recovery Specialist

Note from the Editor: Death's Head wrote this article before the news broke out the S.W.O.R.D. has been canceled as of issue #5.  Still, everything he said is still valid and he said you should all do everything in your power so he can keep getting paid.

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Anonymous said...

Here's a thought....if Marvel kept publishing Sword but titled it:

Joss Whedon's S.W.O.R.D

instead of just S.W.O.R.D, i guarentee you the the sales would increase.

Alternatively, Marvel could ask Joss to allow them to put his name on as a co-author to build up more readership, even if Gillon keeps the entirety of the writing.

I doubt Whedon would be too opposed to doing that, and i'm sure this would increase readership.

Anonymous said...

The above comment has merit, but more importantly and certainly with no disrespect, the covers need either a) a different cover artist or b) more compelling covers. The story and inside art is wonderful but the covers do not excite.

I really hope this title is's a fun ride, folks.

Kirk Warren said...

The first two covers were the only really bad ones. Looked like they took unused character sketches from Cassaday and threw a title on it. They have some really stunning covers coming up for the final few issues (unless this letter campaign takes off and it gets a stay of execution).

Steven said...

I think the covers are fine. The interior art, however, is far too cartoony for a sci-fi adventure book. That along with the artists inability to draw a Beast that looks even remotely like the established look is very distracting.

Couldn't someone tell him that the character looks like a feline, not whatever that horselike thing he keeps drawing is. Although I will cast this rendition as another good reason to devolve Beast back to his former hairy incarnation. At least no one had problems drawing him then.

I will say, in this day and age, if the book got cancelled literally the week only the 3rd issue came out, then the sales must have been truly abominable.

Matt Ampersand said...

The way they draw Beast in this book is a lot closer to the way Frank Quitely originally drew him when he went through his secondary mutation in New X-Men. Look at this cover for example...

Ryan K Lindsay said...

Balls! That really didn't last long at all, shame. I honestly thought, when it all started, that this would go okay. Do some Incredible Herc numbers, perhaps. What a letdown.

People can probably still race out and gets issues 1-3, they'd still be on the stands from the sounds of it, and it's most certainly worth it.

If not, one sad trade will be it. I wonder what they'll put Kieron Gillen and Steven Sanders on now instead...?

Kirk Warren said...

I believe Gillen will be doing Savage Axe of Ares. Not sure if its a mini or ongoing.

Brandon Whaley said...

Gillen on Ares? I can get into that. And I personally think that Sanders' Beast is the best incarnation yet. The new covers look to be gorgeous. Ah well. I'll buy the last two issues and enjoy them immensely.

Anonymous said...

I believe Savage Axe of Ares is just one of those black and white magazines that Marvel has been putting out, like they did for Shang Chi and Iron Man.


Anonymous said...

SWORD shouldn't die like this!

Nathan Aaron said...

Wow! SWORD is the new Dakota North! (ANYONE remember that series?) Man I loved Dakota North, and it got the can in only five issues! I was so disappointed (but so happy that they brought the character back yeeeaaarrrs later in Daredevil.) The only thing that beat Dakota North on cancellation was Druid (the Warren Ellis one, before he was THE Warren Ellis.) Now they exclaim Druid was a mere four issue mini series, because they're just too embarrassed to reveal it was supposed to be a series but got canned in four issues.

I'm really surprised SWORD is doing THAT badly. Shocking.

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