Humans, please hit the "Click Here to Read More" hyperlink to read my very important message regarding S.W.O.R.D.
I absolutely love money, and S.W.O.R.D. is paying me copious amounts of it to subcontract my persona. I am very impressed by the size of their coffers, but it seems that not enough of you squishy creatures are buying their main source of revenue, which is the monthly color pamphlet I mentioned earlier. If you do not purchase more of these floppy paper products, S.W.O.R.D. funding may actually run out and I will no longer be under their employ. While I am sure I would find greener pastures, I am also sure you want your favorite freelance peacekeeping agent to keep making guest appearances in the title, yes? Not to mention my wonderful temporary boss and temporary coworkers would also be out of a reliable job and consistent flow of income.
So what can you do to help S.W.O.R.D. pay me for the repairs of my interstellar transport, my optical techno-organ, and my absolutely exorbitant day rate? If you are not currently reading the ongoing series of S.W.O.R.D., you should call your local comic book merchant and ask for the series to be placed in your list of purchasable titles. If you are already acquiring the series, you can always introduce the book to one of your friends, loved ones or acquaintances. Spreading the word in your technological web of information and digital social networks is also a very good idea, and a fine venue for campaigns such as this one. Finally, anyone can go to this Uniform Resource Locator to find a printable postal card to be sent to Marvel, the company in charge of appropriating S.W.O.R.D.'s funds. Ask them to keep financing the agency, and by proxy, me, yes?
Note from the Editor: Death's Head wrote this article before the news broke out the S.W.O.R.D. has been canceled as of issue #5. Still, everything he said is still valid and he said you should all do everything in your power so he can keep getting paid.